Labels

I Love You (3) lagu fav (1) perasaan (38) TTC (44)

Tuesday, October 2, 2012

New TTC update

As the new cycle started on 22 September, so today is my appointment in Hospital Putrajaya for FT.
Pukul 8.30 tiba..ramainya orang hari ni..ambil no je dah setengah jam lebih sikit..then lapor kat klinik O&G ~ kul 11.00 baru dapat jumpa Dr...the same Dr. for last month treatment, Dr. Suhaila kalau x silap..
Then, FT result ada satu je about 3.2 cm X ??(tak ingat dah)...
Quite big , right?

Dr dah mushkil, is it becouse of the clomid tapi hari ni baru D11..or something else...I dont have cyst record before but she mentioned it can happen..and she went to get second opinion from other Dr...So, disebabkan tak sure adakah itu follicle ataupun cyst..She prescribe me with Pregnyl 10,000 ml, and have to come for check-up on 15th Oct. If it is a follicle, it wont be around anymore on that day, otherwise it might be cyst..

Drop my jar...how can that possibly be?

The last thing i want to hear now is having another problem as addition to my current hard-to-conceive situation ..i feel like crying..could things get worsen each time? What else could be wrong now? Have i not having enough cause in this TTC journey?

Oh yes, actually i don't know why...
Tiba-tiba rasa sangat malas nak go on treatment this month...
Rasa macam," apa nak jadi pun jadilah"..
Even sebenarnya nak pegi appointment pagi tadi, puas hubby pujuk baru i pegi..
bangun pagi semalam dah cakap kat hubby," if i rasa malas nak continue treatment bulan ni boleh tak?"

Entahlah, semuanya serba tak kena..
Actually im having some crisis with my hubby last weekend..
I know most of the time, it was my mistake..
I dont know why, but recently i became more sensitive with what ever he did or said...
Im so vulnerable and easy to cry..even small things can make me sad...
Having those stupid nightmare which interrupted my emotion...

Mood swing....

Rasa macam pasrah je...
Maybe i did something horrible and terrible without realising it..
And thats why maybe God is punishing me for that..

And one point i think i am strong enough to go through this.. full of inspiration and motivation..as i always believe God will never burden something that is beyond your capability...
But at one point, i cried as i feel i can't go on to face this situation yet to accept the fact that i might not have my own babies...


TTC Inspiration Graphic Pick Me Up Thread :  wedding Stronger




7 comments:

  1. dear, jangan cepat patah semangat.. kuatkan hati utk menghadapi segala ujian dari-Nya.. plz take care yer dear..

    sorry sebab lupa jer nak email awak.. nnti add zana kat fb yer dear.. but kalau boleh msg kat fb tu nama honeylily, so that zana tau.. fb zana, Zana Adieyza

    ReplyDelete
  2. Betul kat zana.. Kalau terasa sunyi, sedih, kami kami kan ada... We're the same shoes....

    ReplyDelete
  3. Dear, take one step at a time... If u need time off, do take it. Stress won't help in our ttc journey. Yang penting jgn putus harap pada Nya.... Coz hope is what keep u going... Take care dear.

    ReplyDelete
  4. Sabar,,sabar..insyaallah ada manis dlm pahit dugaan kita

    ReplyDelete
  5. thanx kawan-kawan..mungkin mood swing disebabkan clomid kot..but im trying to control my emotions yang tak menentu ni..thanx for always be there

    ReplyDelete
  6. thanx to all who tend to support my only diamond in my life ...

    ReplyDelete
  7. Sukar nye.. mne nak cri kekuatan itu. Amalan kurma +susu kambing kurang berjaya ke? macam nak cuba.. :(

    ReplyDelete

Follow by Email